Received care package from Flevins, Fay, and Ffuhrmeister. Package contained:

one (1) half-deck of playing cards, Jokers removed and replaced with Green and Red Mana from a Magic: The
Gathering booster pack
two (2) labels peeled from bottles of Boone's Farm, the writing of which inexplicably seems to be Dutch
one (1) "crazy" straw, heavily patched together with scotch tape.
S
pent several hours attempting to unravel mystery of why my friends would send me such a random assortment of tchotskies when I clearly requested fresh Moleskins and perhaps a concert recording of "Astral Weeks." Was convinced it was an elaborate rebus, until I fortuitously remembered that my friends are retarded.