Awoke to throbbing feeling of helplessness in uncaring universe, punctuated by vomit. Regurgitated something that could only charitably be described as Crab Rangoon and bits of a wooden stick I had used in the creation of a popsickle made of wine. Decided to spend rest of day listening to Bridge Over Troubled Water and staring intensely at paintings.

Returned from particularly eventful washroom incident to find laptop surrounded by giggling 19-year olds. Waved arms and produced loud noises as if they were overly industrious birds. The affair lasted around a minute, but the damage to my reputation will last a lifetime.

HELO HELO YES <("")>
AMERICAN

Attempted to communicate relevant points of postcolonial theory to a peasant who believed that Michael Jordan was the current American President. Gave up halfway through and started muttering obscenities to myself. This discrepancy went unnoticed by my audience.

Was jolted awake by an image of my childhood: I rode a merry-go-round, clinging to the plaster as I grew increasingly terrified of my father's laughing, mustachioed visage. Attempted to write this down in my Moleskine, but found myself unconsciously sketching portraits of faceless naked women. Will determine appropriate punishment later today.

I realize now that I've left my window open. Ruminated on how this will bother me for six months. This trip is doomed from the start.

A man has already attempted to sell me a watch, though I clearly do not need one. I felt sick to my stomach and shielded my eyes until he left. I will never trust again.

Arrived in China. Shirtless man with complex stringed instrument greeted me with folk song about loss, farming. I feel as if I've come home.